Warning: this will be a "poor-pitiful-me" post. A rant, if-you-will. If you're not into that sort of thing, just ignore me. I apologize. But I'm just not feeling good about myself lately.
Have I worked out at all this week? No. Have I eaten right? Nope. Did I devour the chocolate chip cookies my mom sent home with me on Monday? You betcha. I have had a gnarly sweet-tooth lately (maybe it's due to Halloween or something) and I consumed more Coke in the last few days than I did all last month. I've got to get a grip.
I am meeting my husband's co-workers for the first time this afternoon and I have nothing to wear that I feel "cute" in. My wardrobe consists of sloppy long-sleeved tee shirts and I have two pairs of jeans that fit. One of them isn't the slightest bit comfortable and the zipper is messed up on it. *sigh* All of my cute autumn transition clothes are too small because I can't fit into my pre-pregnancy clothes still. And I only have a few items of clothing I can actually wear because clothes cost money and this year has been...well, despite having a baby and loving being a mom, it's been a really, really hard year on all of us in more areas than one. Sometimes I don't get to eat until after 8:00 p.m., if the baby is having an extra fussy evening. Yesterday, I chowed down on a greasy chicken sandwich and fries from our cafeteria at work. Today, we are having a pizza party.
Must. Get. a. Grip.
I picked out the cutest thing I have, which is a short-sleeved cardigan with a black cami underneath and my "good" pair of jeans and a pair of black boots. Maybe that will do. It's a bit oversized, but at least it will hide my flab. It's in the car and I'll change at my mom's when I go to pick up the boy. I just don't want people thinking my husband is married to a slob. But, tomorrow, I'll probably wear a long-sleeved tee shirt and PJ pants. And Sunday, I'll wear one of the two church outfits I have that fits. Luckily, I don't have to dress up for work. But I feel sloppy and uncomfortable every single day.
Unlike Kyrstin, I don't feel comfortable with my body right now. I am soft and babies love soft. But, I think I'm too soft. My stomach has always been my problem area and now it's even worse. Throw in extra hip and butt fat. MK says that I still look good, but I don't believe him. I don't like who I see in the mirror.
I have to do this for me. I don't want to be one of those women who has "let herself go." True, I had a baby 6 months ago, but I know all kinds of women who look...not as bad as I do...after having a kid.
Not sure what the point of this post was, other than to just vent my feelings. I'm not really adding any nuggets of goodness to the blog today. And for that, I apologize. Maybe I'll feel better next week. And maybe I'll be desperate enough to haul my butt to the gym on Monday. We'll see...
3 comments:
Me too! Having a baby changes your body in ways you don't even expect. I am working on a blog about this very topic ( i just need to take the pics) But I feel the same way and I'll bet most of those women who look ok after having a baby are hiding quite a bit that you don't see.
Oh, honey. Clothes are evil. I'm pretty sure we talked about that a few months back. It might not make sense, but they are. And those women who look that good? They probably don't have jobs or take care of their own children. Or they won the genetic lottery.
I agree with both the above comments. You've just been through HELL physically, and clothes ARE evil! You look beautiful... so don't get too down about it. It took me 18 months to lose the baby weight....
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